July 2012
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heytinafey:
bless this family
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breaau:
omfg
I think I'm missing the point of the Olympics
Me while watching:
Jesus, look at those arms.
Damn, look at those quads.
Sweet Lord, look at that butt.
oraphis:
Pretended to die to see how my dog would react.
glimmering:
moment of silence for the women who are competing in the olympics while on their period
society: Everyone's beautiful.
society: Don't eat though, you don't want to get fat.
society: You don't eat? Anorexic freak!
society: You're a size 4? You're supposed to be a size 0!
society: You're an A cup? What are you, 8?
society: You're a C cup? That's my mums size.
society: You had sex?! Slut!
society: You haven't had sex? Hah, you're frigid!
society: You don't think you're pretty? Attention seeker!
society: You think you're pretty? Conceited much?
society: You believe in gay rights? Homo!
society: You don't believe in gay rights? Homophobic dickhead!
society: You're depressed? Attention seeker!
society: You cut yourself? Still attention seeking!
society: You can't go on? How much attention do you want?!
-someone kills themself-
society: Oh, they were so beautiful! Society sucks!
Batman: Hey I'm going to disappear for 8 years.
Bruce Wayne: Hey I'm going to disappear for 8 years.
People of Gotham: Shut up Bruce, we're trying to figure out who Batman is.
Batman: I'M BACK!
Bruce Wayne: ME TOO.
People of Gotham: NO ONE CARES BRUCE. WHO THE FUCK IS BATMAN?
when america hosts the olympics
oprah: YOU GET A GOLD MEDAL AND YOU GET A GOLD MEDAL AND EVERYONE LOOK UNDER YOUR CHAIR BECAUSE YOU ALL GET A GOLD MEDAL!!!!!!!!
me on 2009: I must like every single page on facebook
me on 2012: I must unlike every single page on facebook
The Zodiac Temperament
Capricorn: wow you pissed me off so I'm going to sulk in silence and snap if spoken to
Aquarius: YOU MADE ME UPSET IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD /melts into a dramatic heap
Pisces: I'M GONNA FUCKING THROW THINGS. LIKE THE BIGGEST TANTRUM. YOU HAVE -EVER- SEEN.
Aries: WOW I'M SO MAD for like a second. What's for dinner?
Taurus: BRB SMASHING HEADLONG THROUGH A WALL TO KILL YOU
Gemini: Oh, I'm not mad. Wait. YES I FUCKING AM. Okay maybe not. BUT THEN AGAIN--
Cancer: ...oh. I'm angry. But you'll never know. Tillit'stoolate. Cookie?
Leo: /INDISCERNIBLE NOISES OF RAGE
Virgo: how could you do this to me. how. HOW??? Get out of my life. No wait baby come back...
Libra: Passively plotting your demise.
Scorpio: This'll only sting for a second. GOD I HATE YOUUUUUUUUUUUU
Sagittarius: I have to leave before I kill someone. Bye!
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Wait! Do people actually think that the queen jumped off that plane?